9/9/98
well then. true love and lots of reveries come and gone. and there are reasons we don’t dream like we used to in high school. the stakes are higher. people think into the future. if you had only told me. i could’ve pulled the o’ so slick woman of your dreams the strong independent woman of the nineties bullshit the every man of the nineties just seems to love and adore. why didn’t you just tell me up front? is that just not the thing men of the nineties know how to do? have a spine?
and now you’re not going to call me back, like you said you would. or maybe you conveniently lost my phone number for the second time this evening. yeah right. bullshit. just hoping i’d check my fucking email you spineless piece of chicken shit? and the truth of the matter, the incredibly disgusting truth of the matter is that if you do call, i will pull that sick woman of the nineties crap. and you’ll lap it up like the dog you are. sure, i’m into open relationships. i’m down with that. i can be cool. i can chill. (fucking prick) i can ease myself around you like i couldn’t care about tomorrow or the fact that you could walk away at any time. it’s not too late for me to pull that act with you.
or is it? since you haven’t called i assume you were expecting super woman. i can fall in love with you and handle your fantasies of other women while we’re fucking. well i’m sorry i wasn’t wet enough for you sugar, i didn’t expect you to waltz on in. i wasn’t up on my supply of astrolube. i’m sure she stays wet for you twenty four seven.
i’ll miss you jonathan. i really will. and i’ll sit up for another hour. even though you said you’d call an hour ago. and won’t i just love myself tomorrow. god i wish it could’ve been you. not because i’m tired of looking, but because i think your the shit. my substantial man. god i’m going to miss you.