I’m sorry I hung up on you Robin, I wanted to call back because I hate going to bed angry and upset, but it wasn’t going to do any good.
I lost my cat this week, I’m exhausted from 2012 planning at work and emotionally drained.
I put out an initial thought on how to get talking again, schedule a call, and it was meant to be something to look forward to, a sister talk over a glass of wine or coffee. Not something on my task list that I have to do. I realize you came around to this idea in the latter part of the call, I recognize that.
I called you back after leaving the office because I regretted having to hang up quickly, after you had expressed worry about our relationship. I didn’t want you to think that I missed that or ignored it. Then I asked if you really wanted to talk now (implying: make a different time to talk) as it was late. It was meant as an honest question, trying to be respectful of the late hour. You brought up that you were worried and then gave me shit for calling back and following up on it.
I know you love me and I can understand why it would be scary to hear I’ve changed my communication with Mom, I’m not close to Dad. I get that.
I’ve worked so hard NOT to have arguments of this kind of emotional tenor in my life. I don’t raise my voice to Brett and he doesn’t at me. He’s not snide and sarcastic with me and I’m not with him. If it is important, he (or I) brings it up and then we set aside some time to really talk about it. I thought we were going to schedule some time for us to talk on a trip to Portland.